[Chat/2021/9]

[Chat/2021/9/1]

  • Author: dzCC4nQM

How can I talk to people? I wanna have some irl friends, but I am social retarted (I am even afraid of asking a stranger "What time is it"). How to approach people without getting nervous and scared?

[Chat/2021/9/2]

  • Author: sJ6bjyiE

If your problem is just that you are scared, maybe you have to convince yourself that there is no danger. Remember, most people want friends. Humans naturally want to be social so most of the time it doesn't make logical sense to be scared of people. From what I understand, our body still has these fight or flight instincts that saved us from threats like t-rexes and shit that would have killed us when we were rock throwing troglodytes. Nowadays our 'threats' aren't actually real, but are mental shit like rejection and embarrassment. Our body still does the only thing it knows how to do when your brain feels threatened: increase your heart rate, make you breathe faster, stop digesting food, sweat, etc. This sucks in reality because these won't help you from a mental threat. In fact, the opposite is usually true. It makes it harder. Maybe knowing that would help you control it. If that sounds convincing go watch healthygamer.gg videos or something. He's a nice guy and seems to know what he's talking about. That's where I got this anxiety explanation from. Or actually talk to a therapist like you are probably supposed to do in this situation.

Not like I would know, anyways. I don't practice what I preach, after all. I'm probably a lot like you, the few 'friends' that I still have irl are people who almost always initiate conversations with me first because we happen to live, go to school, or work together. I can go days without talking to another human. I hardly ever share any personal thoughts or details about myself, and when I do I am intentionally vague or embellish the truth so I don't actually end up sharing much. That's probably the main reason. I don't actually talk with anyone. I just 'talk' to them. I'm scared too. Not scared of the conversation itself, but scared of people knowing who I am, actually knowing me. But you have to be personal to make personal relationships.

This ended up more depressing and about me than I intended but typing it out and posting into the void (disclaimer: not actually the void but a person's hard drive) mostly-anonymously where probably only like 30 people max will ever read it makes my brain-meat feel a little better. Maybe you can try that. It's like therapy but free and you don't have to interact with a human. Good luck out there, fellow robot. Everything is fixable. If I believe that still, you can too.

[Chat/2021/9/3]

  • Author: FrsZgMLo

>1

Get a hobby outside the house if you have an active hobby people will come to you just nod form time to time and pretend youre paying attention, dont bring politics or your retarded animes up.

Alternatively: do drugs.

[Chat/2021/9/4]

  • Author: FrsZgMLo

>1

Get a hobby outside the house if you have an active hobby people will come to you just nod form time to time and pretend youre paying attention, dont bring politics or your retarded animes up.

Alternatively: do drugs.

[Chat/2021/9/5]

  • Author: dzCC4nQM

>[Chat/2021/9/2]
Thank you. I will try using your advice.
I used to be a very locked guy as well especially in front of my parents.

[Chat/2021/9/6]

  • Author: dzCC4nQM

>[Chat/2021/9/3]
Sounds good. Thank you for the advice, but I wont do drugs.

[Chat/2021/9/7]

  • Author: M5W0dDkP

Try talking nonsense to people in the bus stop or something.
It really helps and you wont be seeing them again.

[Chat/2021/9/8]

  • Author: nvYeJafB

Depends, what do you look like?